Princess Mononoke

1997 - 2.4/5

I really didn’t know what I was getting myself into when I rented this movie. I had never seen a Hayao Miyazaki movie before. I heard that his movies were really good, and because Disney’s name was attached to it, I’ve always wanted to see them.

I thought the storyline was interesting, but a lot of parts could have been cut out to make it shorter. The voiceover’s were okay, and the animation was okay too.

I think I went in expecting way to much, and I’m a little disappointed, however, that doesn’t mean I will not watch another one of Miyazaki’s movies again.

The Help

2011 - 4.2/5

Once I saw the trailer for this movie, I knew it was one I had to see with my mom…she enjoyed it as much as I did! What a great movie!

Plot: A
This movie is an adaptation of the book The Help. It follows Emma Stone’s character Skeeter, who aspires to be a writer. She decides to attempt something that has never been attempted before: write stories from the point of view of black women who are considered ‘the help’ to white families.

Script: A
I truly loved the screenplay. I had texted myself some of the quotes I liked during the movie, but for some reason they’ve been delete. Thanks to IMDB, I found 2 I really liked.

Aibileen Clark: You is kind. You is smart. You is important.

Aibileen Clark: I ain't never had no white person in my house before.

Acting: A+
Instead of naming EVERY cast member, I’ll just have to say EVERYONE was PHENOMENAL! Each and every character was SO convincing in their role. I realized that when you really hate a character, that the actor playing that role has done such an awesome job – case in point: Hilly Holbrook (aka Bryce Dallas Howard). Everyone played their part to a T.

Overall: A
The plot was great, the script was good, and the acting was amazing! A movie I really want to buy it and watch it again!

Heat

1995 - 2.7/5

I was unaware that this movie was almost 3 hours long. But unlike the movie itself, I’ll try to keep the review short.

Neil McCauley (DeNiro) is a thief and he is really good. Along with Chris Shiherlis (Kilmer) and Michael Cheritto (Sizemore) they decide to go after one last big score at a bank. Vincent Hanna (Pacino) is a detective who wants to take McCauley down.

I found that it started off at a good pace, but slowed down at the half way mark; although I don’t necessarily think the movie dragged at any point, I do think it was longer than it needed to be. It did have some good action scenes, but some were over-the-top.

DeNiro and Pacino are a great pair, and this movie highlights that. I wasn’t really drawn into one character or another. I found that I didn’t really care about the characters and what happens to them, although, near the end when Hanna was chasing McCauley I couldn’t decide who I wanted to prevail.

The script was okay, but I didn’t think there was anything that was really compelling. I did like McCauley’s line “I’m alone, I am not lonely”.

Overall, I did like it, but it was longer than it should have been. I doubt I’ll ever watch it again, but it’s worth the one viewing.

The Stoning of Soraya

2008 - 3.2/5

From the day this movie came out on DVD I had always wanted to watch it. It’s unfortunate that it took so long, but nevertheless I decided to rent it. On a sunny Sunday afternoon I sat down to watch this movie with my cup of tea. Judging by the title, I wasn’t expecting it to be as bright as the weather. Although it was evident what was to be expected, this movie depicted Soraya’s situation that lead up to her inevitable fate.

Right away the music really helps set a somber tone and atmosphere. The story of Soraya’s unjust death is told to Freidoune Sahebjam, a French-Iranian journalist whose car broke down in the remote town that the stoning occurred. Zahra is the one telling Freidoune what had happened only a day prior.

Zahra was a powerful person and the only one that spoke out against her niece’s helpless situation. I would say that my favourite line was when she said (to the journalist), “The voices of women do not matter here. I want you to take my voice with you”. Shohreh Aghdashloo does an amazing job and she is a great actress. Mozhan Marno was great in her role as Soraya M. Considering I’ve never heard of her before, she did a phenomenal job with this role. I defiantly want to give big props to Jim Caviezel who learned to speak Farsi in 2 weeks for his role as Freidoune. I was also very impressed with all the other cast members: the husband Ali, the mullah, the mayor Ebrahim, Hashem, ect.

The only negative thing about this film would be that it’s based on a true story – meaning that these injustices actually take place in Iran and other countries. This is not a feel-good movie, but one that everyone should see.

Cellular

2004 - 3/5

Let me start off by saying that you cannot go into this movie thinking you’re about to see a masterpiece – it is far from it. BUT, if you want to be entertained, then I think it’s worth your time. I will say that there are several plot holes, but they can be overlooked. When I first saw this I thought it was going to be very similar to Phonebooth, but its not – this movie is good, whereas Phonebooth sucked!

Plot: B-
Not even 5 minutes in and the action begin! The movie starts with Kim Basinger’s character Jessica getting kidnapped from her own home. She is driven to a different location and locked in an attic. She has no idea where she is and why she has been taken. The only (very old school) phone in the room had been smashed to pieces by one of her captures, but she soon realizes the phone still has a dial tone. After clicking some wires together (cough*bullshit*cough), she gets through to an immature young guy named Ryan (Chris Evans). She pleads for help while Ryan thinks it’s a big joke. After overhearing a confrontation, Ryan soon realizes this isn’t a joke. Basically, the rest of the movie is about Ryan running around trying to help/find Jessica.

Acting: B-
For what they had to work with, I think that Kim Basinger and Chris Evans did a great job portraying their roles. I think this was the first movie I’ve ever seen Jason Statham in; he’s always type-casted in action roles and he did a good job as the bad guy. William H Macy did a good job as well with his Policemen role, but it was a relatively small role.

Overall: B-
For what it was and what I expected, it delivered. It was very suspenseful and it had good flow. It’s not a movie in which the viewer can guess why Jessica was kidnapped, and I think that that made it more entertaining. Stay with the pace of the movie, don’t over-think it, and it will be worth the watch.

True Romance

1993 - 3/5

To the best of my knowledge, the only Tarantino movies I’ve seen are Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Death Proof (Grindhouse) and Inglourious Basterds. I own them all, and about 4 years ago, I bought True Romance because I like Quentin Tarantino and Christopher Walken. I didn’t really know what it was about prior to watching it. I liked all the actors (Slater, Arquette, Hopper, Oldman, Rapaport, Pitt, Kilmer); I liked the plot, it was simple. The script was typical Tarantino, but there wasn’t any part of the dialogue that really stood out. There was a lot of violence, but would it really be a Tarantino movie if there wasn’t? Although I did enjoy watching this movie, I don’t see myself watching it again.

Bad Teacher

2011 – 2.9/5

***SPOILER ALERT***

Plot: C
Starts off with Elizabeth Hasley (Cameron Diaz) getting dumped by her rich fiancé (and his mother), so she could no longer be a gold digger, which meant she had to go back to teaching. She decides to get breast implants to impress the new (rich) substitute teacher Scott Delacorte (Justin Timberlake).

The plot was a bit shaky and there were a few times in which something was brought up, but never to be mentioned again (the ‘tutoring’ she offered), or it was unnecessary completely (the car wash because she didn’t take the money). Was the dry humping really necessary to move the plot forward? How that actually came to be wasn’t explained as well. So Scott is okay with cheating on his girlfriend only because she’s not there? Other than the voicemail that Amy Squirrel (Elizabeth’s rival and Scott’s girlfriend) got which made her more frantic, there was no point.

At first it was funny that she was showing school-related movies in her class, then it quickly became redundant. Throwing balls at students because they got the wrong answer was funny in theory, but in reality it was pretty brutal.

I had no idea this movie was rated R. It was more vulgar than I expected, but for pure entertainment value it was funny. With that being said, it was highly unrealistic; I would sure hope that there aren’t teachers that swear, drink, smoke marijuana, and practically abuse the students. I can’t understand how Elizabeth became a teacher in the first place.

Script: B-
Although I did enjoy the script, I think it was written to appeal to a certain audience. Here are some of the conversations/lines I really liked:

Elizabeth Halsey: Okay, fine! I’ll sign the pre-nup.
Mark: It’s over, Elizabeth.
Elizabeth Halsey: Mark, I'm pregnant!
Mark: No, you’re not.
Mrs. Pubich: Bullshit!
Elizabeth Halsey: Okay, fine. I'm not actually pregnant.

Elizabeth: I really love helping bums.

Shawn: LeBron is a better rebounder and passer.
Russell: LeBron will never beat Jordan. Call me when LeBron has six championships.
Shawn: That's your only argument?
Russell: It's the only argument I need Shawn!

Elizabeth: Want to get a bite to eat?
Lynn: Ya, my treat.
Elizabeth: No. Last time you got it. We’ll split it!

Acting: A-
I would like to start off by saying that if Justin Timberlake wasn’t in this movie, my rating for this category would have been higher. His ‘acting’ seems to be going downhill fast! I just don’t think he can play the role of a ‘geek’ (even his role in Friends With Benefits was a bit on the nerdy side, and he just can’t pull it off). I was wondering how long the school needed a substitute teacher for anyways. Cameron Diaz is a great actress and I think she played her role very well. Her character isn’t one I’d ‘root for’ considering she has zero morals, but she played the part well. Jason Segel is a great actor. I think acting comes naturally to him, especially in comedies. He played his gym teacher character (Russell Gettis) very well.

I really liked Phyllis Smith’s character Lynn Davis; I thought her character was funny and that she deserved more screen time. Her awkwardness was so funny to watch and she said her lines perfectly. Elizabeth’s roommate Kirk was pretty funny too. I loved his scene in which he confronted Carl Halabi with the pictures (with ‘Carl Halabi’ written on his left hand and ‘invelope’ written on this right). However, when Carl had to make a statement in front of Elizabeth, Amy, the principal and the superintendent, the only thought going through my mind was ‘how convenient’ rather than ‘how clever’ in regards to the pictures being used to blackmail him.

Overall: B-
After reading several reviews on IMDB I do agree that this movie has many faults. I did find it funny, but I don’t think it was timeless funny. There was a lot of crude humor, at times funny, others, not so much. I cannot justify giving it a higher rating.